Forget everything you know about “posing” for your wedding photos.
Ever wonder how I get those candid wedding photos that feel so natural and effortless? Maybe you want that for your own wedding? Let me show you how to get there and feel 100% confident without memorizing poses or being directed by your photographer all day (because that’s not what I do).
Before we start, set your intentions.
While you want your guests to have an amazing time at your wedding, you deserve to fully experience it too, and you should be leaving for your honeymoon on cloud nine, having had the best time, hearts full. When you start planning your wedding, and repeatedly throughout the process, take a step back to look at the bigger picture. Why are you having a wedding celebration at all? It’s because you want to marry the love of your life and celebrate with your favorite people, all in one place, present, intentional, meaningful, and fun, right?! If you approach your wedding with this goal of presence in mind, the photos will naturally follow suit.
I love this shot of Katie and Brady’s wedding guests gathered in the conservatory at Iris Aisle, watching their first dance. Everyone’s faces are full of joy, love, and excitement—the perfect reflection of such an intentional day spent with their favorite people.
Care for your body and mind!
Your physical prep and self-care can make or break how you look and feel on your wedding day, so make sure you’re taking care of your physical and mental health leading up to your wedding. It’s important—it really is!
For some, large social events and deep conversations with dozens of people over just a couple of days can be overwhelming. If you’re stressing, just know that it can also be fun and fulfilling, and there doesn’t have to be a “social hangover” or any dread if you’re getting enough sleep and eating well in the months leading up to your wedding. Don’t be tempted to crash diet or do everything yourself the night before guests arrive. Plan for sleep, rest, and wellness so you can literally have a healthy glow and feel rested, energized, and ready for this big social outpouring.
Emily & Nolan’s wedding was all about their people! They brought guests together from all over the country who had never met, and fostered a social, cocktail style reception environment to give everyone lots of opportunities to meet, mingle, chat, and get to know each other.
Hire beauty pros to lighten your load!
One of the biggest sources of anxiety on a wedding day is physical appearance. Hair, makeup, and wardrobe make a huge impact for many people. An incredible vendor team can help you feel like your best self—and let’s be real, most people aren’t doing pro-level hair and makeup on their own. I highly recommend investing in this area if it’s not your strength. It takes so much stress off your shoulders (said personally, as someone who is terrible at doing hair—I just hire a pro and relax while they do their thing)!
Also, hire a bridal stylist who can pull looks together for both of you if you aren’t sure what to wear. This is another area where I personally love having help. I always recommend my favorite stylist in the world, Natalie Gray. She can work with you wherever you’re getting married. Hiring the right people and planning mindfully helps you feel relaxed and confident on the big day—and that ease always shows in your photos.
Natalie Gray styled this stunning LGBTQIA+ editorial elopement for a lesbian couple at Brooklyn’s Prospect Park Boathouse in NYC. I think about this shoot all the time, and I just love how she styled Helena and Fiona—they were both so chic, timeless, elegant, simple and romantic.
Let’s talk about your timeline!
Another way to go into the day feeling calm and confident is having a solid plan in place for your timeline and vendors, especially photography. I talk to all my clients before the wedding day about their timeline—not so we’re stuck to a rigid plan, but so everyone has a confident idea of the flow of events, who’s needed for photos and when, and we’re not scrambling or stressing mid-day. If you don’t have a timeline or you need help with it. I’m always happy to weigh in on questions.
We’ll cover everything from arrival and departure times to where and how you’re getting ready, who will be with you, what photos we’re doing before and after the ceremony, and who needs to be present for them. For family formals, I’ll review the list with you before the wedding and help determine your groupings. I’ll also organize the order for maximum efficiency so family members can get back to the celebration quickly. I like to do these in a specific order, and my clients who trust me on this are so much less stressed. It’s fast and easy if you trust.
I also love building flexibility into timelines to reduce stress and try to plan for a few very short moments throughout the day for couples’ photos, instead of a big, drawn out block of photos. I usually do these right after the first look (if you’re doing one), right after the ceremony (if you’re not), during cocktail hour (just for a few minutes so you can join your guests—it’s so important to me that you’re not pulled away for long), and again at sunset or blue hour for a different vibe. Having multiple portrait breaks gives you flexibility in the event your mood changes or things are running behind. You can decide in the moment “Actually, we want to stay for the whole cocktail hour” and skip one, and it’s fine because we already got great portraits earlier!
Jessica & Phillip’s candlelit dinner reception under the stars was 100% candid coverage, absolutely no posing. They wanted to be present with their people and they really were! It was beautiful!
Trust your photographer!
During formals and creative portraits, I’ll gently guide and adjust as we go to make sure you look your best. I don’t like getting too rigid with posing because the real beauty comes out when you two have a moment alone, away from the noise, just being together. Whatever unfolds there is magic. Lean into it and trust the process. When you trust, you get to be in your day. Talk about your vows, laugh about Aunt Martha, or just take in the feeling of “I can’t believe we just did that.”
The long and short of it is: I’m your friend, and you can rely on me. I’ve been doing this for 15 years. I’m always watching for those small, emotional moments with your people, the second you look absolutely stunning in perfect light, the bigger ambient scenes that tell the full story. You don’t need to think about what to do with your face or where to put your hands. I’ve got you! You can honestly just forget the camera is even there.
I’ll handle the angles, the light, the framing—everything. You don’t need to perform or think about posing; that’s the whole point. You married the love of your life and celebrated intentionally with your favorite people. It only happens once. Be there for it, and know in your heart that the gallery will be gorgeous if you just lean in. ♥︎